Everything Flows Onward

finding my dharma. living my dharma.

3 months, or a lifetime April 5, 2008

Filed under: change,goals — Jenny @ 1:31 pm

Yesterday was my 3 months in Evansville. Has it really only been 3 months? Que la vie change vite. (So, my audience is going to have to get over the fact that my blogs from here on out are going to be riddled with French phrases, just because that’s the way I’m thinking now…) I really feel like I’ve been here for a year or longer. This month was successful because I’d been in the mood to go running a fair amount and consequently, I learned a lot of short cuts that help me avoid busy and obnoxious Evansville streets. Woohoo!

Another milestone, of course, is the completion of my first full week of Qu├ębecois. It had its ups and downs, but over all I don’t guess I can complain. The good thing is I realized that everyone knows how big of a challenge it is, and no one at CMC expects me to be perfect. Read: They don’t think I’m a fraud and they aren’t going to fire me. Haha. That helped lower the stress level a bit, but I am still beat from this week. It really is amazing how tired a little mental strife can make a person.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about goals. My main goal now is to conquer Qu├ębecois. But I got to wondering what I’ll do once I do that. (And rest assured, I will.) Because the truth is, once that happens, I’ll probably stop liking my job. (Yea I said it… this week I actually considered the fact that I might like my job.) But I’m enjoying it because of the stress and the excitement of struggling through a French call. (Saying that is going to bite me in the ass next week, I can feel it.) So once that becomes “easy,” I’m going to get bored. It’s just what I do. Ask anyone who knows me.

Alors, quelques questions: What’s next? What do I want to do after this? Where do I want to go? Who do I want to go with, if anyone at all? How far should I go? Shouldn’t I start saving money?

Should I go to Canada? or… Why shouldn’t I go to Canada? Ignoring the face that I’ll spend the entirety of my time there shivering, I’m thinking… why not? If I’d already be accustomed to the language, why shouldn’t I head up that way and see what it has to offer? I could speak French in a job up there. I’d have experience on my side. And just like everything else in life, it wouldn’t necessarily be permanent and it’d probably be a hell of a lot of fun.

But to return to goals less specific… I think it’s time to start making a list. (And don’t we all know how much I love to make a list…) It’s time to start brainstorming. It’s time to start thinking of another way to throw my life off balance and force myself to put it back at some kind of equilibrium.

‘Coz heaven’s forbid it if life were to get easy.